Suitable Suitors?

That guy called again last night.

Just as a guide for men everywhere, here are some topics you should NOT bring up when calling a girl for the first or, indeed, the second time.

1. Your sex life, or lack there of. At some point this becomes important, but not the first time I talk to you.

2. The sex life of anyone you know. Or anyone you don't know. Really, sex just isn't a good "getting to know you" topic.

3. Lack of money, lack of job, lack of education.
If it comes up, it comes up, but for heaven's sake don't go out of your way to tell a girl that you have nothing to offer.

4. Do not have a conversation about how you don't know how to have a conversation. You may think you're excusing that reacurring awkward lull, but you're really just confirming my suspicions that your thoughts are not worth voicing, much less listening to.

5. Please do not ask the girl if you're annoying her. If she's polite in any sense of the word she cannot tell you the truth.